Archive for May, 2012

Hot air


It was a very warm, sunny afternoon. Five minutes into the meeting the fire alarm went off. We dutifully trooped out down the stairs (because it was ten past five, I grabbed my bag and my car keys – I still remember the day there really was a fire at 5pm and everyone left the […]

“You’re looking nice again!” I said to Mrs R. “You don’t usually look nice on a Sunday morning.” I paused… That hadn’t come out as I expected. What I meant was, you’re wearing that pretty summer dress that you wore yesterday. I really like it.. I could feel the hole begin to grow beneath my […]

The old car is back after a successful transplant operation. We’ve been driving together, but… things just aren’t the same between us any more.  There’s no trust in our relationship… Not like there used to be. Sometimes when I stop at traffic lights I remember the sleek looks and silent engine of the eco-model. I […]

Silent running


Here’s a strange thing. I’m beginning the like the stop-start and bossy information panel in the eco-car. Stopping at traffic lights has become a peaceful moment of zen-like calm. The engine stops, the car relaxes and so do I. The car becomes a vibration free cocoon, silent except for the gently hum of the air […]

While my car is being repaired (they haven’t worked out the cause of the problem yet) the garage has lent me another car. It is a brand new car. This possibly demonstrates how much the garage trusts and values me as a faithful customer. Or perhaps they know that after a few days of driving […]



Like a champion cocktail blender or a recent English graduate I set a new personal best in metaphor mixing at a meeting today. I inadvertently described an idea as “the tail wagging the red herring”. The good thing is that everyone knew exactly what I meant. Meanwhile I won’t give up my day job of […]

I received an email from someone called Elsie Ladner. “If somehow your nether rod has lost its rock-like strength in „excited-mode‰, you need a blue caplet to save you!” She said, breathlessly. Nether rod?! I imagine that this is something used by a Dutch fisherman. Excited-mode? Sounds like an option on a games console controller, […]

Gun boat


Security at the Olympics has been in the news (reminder: Welcome to London, home of the 2012 Olympic games). Apparently the army is planning to position missile launchers around the capital to defend the city. Despite some public objections this seems a fairly non-disruptive and cost-effective solution, particularly compared with the cost and hassle of […]